we’re up all night ‘til the sun


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My life is strange and beautiful lately. Sometimes I wake up, and am paralysed in my bed for a little while. I look around my room, and the things around me begin to change, until they resemble something else entirely. I lay there, unmoving, as I hallucinate, and am unafraid. I think I see a giant cockroach on the other end of my room, and become fascinated by it. In reality it is just  my wardrobe. Last night I thought I saw a bearded man’s face, with a blue-glass eye, coming out of my wall. It was merely my chest of drawers. I know exactly why this is happening, and there is no need for anyone to worry. Even though it might sound like a frightening experience, it really isn’t. Not to me. I am used to vivid dreaming, and living in a world of my own imagining. I know it will pass, and I am in no great hurry for it to do so.

So much has happened in the last few weeks that I cannot process yet, cannot articulate. I know I will need to, at some point, try to MAKE SOMETHING out of everything I have seen and done – but for now I am just so grateful for the turn my life has taken, and to be living it. This is a fertile period, where everything is happening so fast and so unpredictably that I cannot get enough distance to analyse it. I am in the eye of a beautiful storm. I would not know where to begin, so for now I won’t try. Just listen to Daughter instead. Corinne recommended them to me, and now I’m hooked.

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